Introduction
   What would parents like to have for their children?
   To have happy children
   To have children walk in the Truth
   To have children who love their parents and who are good companions

   What would children like to have from their parents?
   To have parents who love and agree with each other
   To have parents they can talk to easily
   To have parents who love them and support them – emotionally, physically, spiritually

   Let’s learn about how some of these things can be accomplished. Young people should pay particular attention to these, because preparing the best conditions in their homes in which to rear children may take a long time.
   A child-centered home is not in the best interest of the child. The best thing parents can do for their children is

• to love each other, precluding their children from playing one parent against the other;
• doing whatever is necessary to assure their love grows steadily through the years, by studying materials together aimed at improving their marriage;
• setting aside time to enhance the marriage bond between them, and affirming to each other how glad each is to be married to the other and having mutual appreciation for the contribution each makes toward creating a happy home;
• applying themselves toward getting along by settling differences intelligently, with forgiveness and love;
• and, talking over little problems in order to cut off the occasion of little problems becoming big problems.

Security in Love
    People often make decisions based on their needs, rather than on what they ought to do. Satisfying physical needs is a strong natural drive in each of us. The foremost thought of a person who has just fallen into the water, is to get to the surface so he can breathe again. If one has not been able to eat for many days, she may scrounge for things she would not normally eat and maybe even, steal some food.
   A child living in a home in which Mom and Dad love one another on a deep, basic level – best, conveyed by father and mother every day … like, frequently hugging each other, every day – is a great source of security for children who know they can’t play one parent against the other. And much of this security is supplied by the father who protects the family from harm; making and enforcing rules that provide for safety and peace; creating emotional stability in the family, by guiding its affairs – even difficult situations – with prudence and discernment. The most important emotional need a child has, is feeling his or her physical needs will be met. If the father is delinquent in, or neglects, providing this security, a family member may try to fill that need through the person of someone outside the family.
   Older children need to know their parents love them, too. Knowing they are loved by father and mother gives them reason and the courage to do what is right, rather than what their peers “determine” is right. There is a way which seems right unto a man, but the end thereof [are] the ways of death, Proverbs 14:12.
   An unhappy marriage, however, whose outcome is divorce between father and mother almost always negatively impacts children.

Love Makes for a Brighter World
    After security, the next emotional need we have, is to feel loved. When once our physical needs are met, and we feel they will continue to be met, then we may begin to concentrate on how people feel about us. Our world is a lot brighter if just one person we respect lets us know, that in some way he or she thinks we’re really good.
   Everyone has a need to know that he or she belongs and is loved. By nature, a person will love, respect and bond with those of his own family. If a young person has no friend, no close brother or sister, no loving father or mother, then her life is desperately empty and if this need is not fulfilled, she may accept second best – wherever it can be found.
   In John 14 and 15, Yahshua tells His disciples about loving one another and about the great love He and the Father have for One Another and for them. Then in John 16:1, He says, “I have told you these things so that you would not be caused to stumble.”
   So, what can a young person do to satisfy his need for love? Since Yahweh is love (1 John 4:16), becoming close to Him through reading His Word, through prayer, and through fellowship with other believers in one of Yahweh’s congregations, is a good place to start.
   Secondly, children can prompt father or mother by asking, “Do you love me?” and then, “Why do you love me?” Dad or Mom will know how to answer the first question, but may need some time to reply to the second. Children should be patient, allowing their parent(s) time to consider an answer to this very important, second question.
   The Scriptures provide several examples of fathers blessing their children. One doesn’t have to be an ordained minister, not even a man, to impart a blessing. Some fathers practice conferring a blessing upon their children as the Sabbath begins. Blessings can greatly strengthen the family and strongly bond children to their parents and to Yahweh. And children can request father or mother to impart to them a blessing without necessarily telling them why a blessing is asked. Dad or Mom can put their hands upon the child’s head and pray to the Father above, to be with the child, to keep him strong, and to confer peace, wisdom, protection, and encouragement.

Chit Chat
    Let’s look at a picture of an ideal home:
   These words which I command you this day shall be upon your heart. And you shall teach them diligently to your children. And you shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up, Deuteronomy 6:6-7.
   Parents should spend a lot of time chatting with their children … about the Scriptures, and also about other things. When parents talk with, and listen with silent attention to, their children, good things happen. (And while we’re on the subject of listening, a parent’s full, respectful and undivided attention is one of the finest gifts a parent can give to a child. Listening costs nothing and nothing is a substitute for it. And children appreciate begin listened to.) An exchange in listening to each other’s conversation will result in each learning a lot about the other, too.
   A listening parent might learn that his child is an interesting and pleasant person, and discover that her son or daughter can be a good friend with real value and personality. Perhaps more importantly, that personality a father may see in his child might more closely be found having been genetically contributed by the child’s mother who the father deeply loves.
   Secondly, the child gains confidence in his parent. She comes to understand how the parent thinks and why he says and does the things he says and does. The parent’s ideas make more sense because they’ve been explained and heard a number of times. But the parent also gains confidence in the child.
   When people talk together, they naturally feel closer together. One reason for “the generation gap” is that people don’t through oral speech communicate with each other. The rise of technology occupies a prominent place in peoples’ lives today. Social media has made people to become less social. Fathers could make it a family rule that ANY TIME an actual human being within the family wants to talk, that PEOPLE ARE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT than TV or CELL PHONES.
   They get to know each other as two people – actual individuals – rather than as a parent and a child. Childhood are very important years during which adult-to-adult relationships are developed and nurtured. Parents can have adult-to-adult conversations with children of any age – even with those very young children who are not yet talking.
   A young child, needing to be told and taught everything, will occupy Dad and Mom’s time, needing to be told and taught everything. Even when words are not said, the young child is still learning and it should be the goal of parents to prepare the child so well, that he and she can make wise choices and decisions as they continue to mature. If the parent has failed to nurture the child, he or she will not be adequately prepared to leave home and commence life as an adult and what will follow, is a hard time for a ‘foolish’ young adult who makes mistakes that will bring injury to him or her, and possibly to the family. Young men and women who were trained, nurtured, and admonished by their parents are prepared to avoid making foolish mistakes.

Summary
    We have talked about three basic needs:
      • physical;
      • security;
      • love.

   Other needs we have addressed are:
      • nurturing a child’s self-esteem;
      • parents’ encouraging their children’s self-actualization, being the best, they can be.

   Parents concentrate their energies toward growing love for one another, and for their children … parents and children, mutually expressing love to each other through words, physical touch, and talking with, and listening attentively, to each other. Parents, and particularly fathers, should prepare their children to become wise adults.
   Let us, therefore, resolve to make our homes more pleasing to every member of our families, but especially to Yahweh, the Father of us all.
   “Husbands, love your wives, even as the Messiah also loved the congregation and gave Himself for it. … This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning the Messiah and the congregation. Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she greatly respects her husband. Children, obey your parents in the Master: for this is right. Honor your father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with you and you may live on the earth. And you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of Yahweh. … Knowing that whatever good thing any man does, he shall receive the same of the Master, whether he be bond or free. … Finally, my brethren, be strong in Yahweh, and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of Yahweh, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of the world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. … Peace be to the brethren, and love with faith, from Yahweh the Father and the Master Yahshua the Messiah. Amen” (Eph. 5:25, 32-6:4, 8, 10-12, 23-24).